A Valentine's Day Challenge: Loving the Unloveable

Valentine's Day is one of my favorite holidays probably because I'm a self-proclaimed hopeless romantic. However I know for others this is one of the worst days ever which just magnifies the inescapable loneliness they may be facing. Regardless of your situation, I would like to ask that you read this with open eyes, ears and a willing heart to understand what a true definition of love in today's world looks like.

Yesterday my husband preached an uncommon message about Valentine's Day. In it, he reminded us how easy it truly is to love those people that we like. I barely have to make an effort to love my husband or my family. However, the true measure of a believer lies in their ability to love the unloveable. I had one such encounter last Friday with the manager of our building. I gently approached her about an incident that was repeatedly occurring which I felt was unfair. Basically there is someone who parks right in front of our door step every day between 7:30 - 7:45 am to drop off her daughter. The problem with this lies in the fact that she is extremely boisterous in the morning and I can hear everything from my apartment. When I am not home and am on my way back from an early morning WOD at CrossFit she makes it impossible for me to get into my parking space because she is literally blocking me in. Needless to say it is not only uncomfortable but oftentimes very annoying to have to put up with it.

In any case, the manager apparently sees no problem with it or has no desire to reach a resolution. She has single-handedly decided to completely disregard my request to find another spot to park/stop her car. Although there is a large sign that reads "No Parking" she has rationalized her way out of following her own rule by saying, "It doesn't say no stopping; you can stop for five minutes."

There are few things in life that bother me more than inconsistency and injustice so this ranks pretty high on my list of pet peeves. Yet the fact remains that there is nothing I can do about it besides maybe call "Help Me Howard" (Oh, and I have contemplated it) and surrender this to God in prayer. My inclination is to hold a grudge against, not only the manager, but the lady that carelessly and inconsiderately parks her car illegally every day to drop off her daughter at the expense of my peace. Yet, I was reminded this weekend by my husband's message that God has called me to love my enemies and pray for those who persecute me.

So on this Valentine's Day I have chosen out of obedience to God to forgive her. Like Jesus exclaimed on that cross when bearing my sins, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." I ask that you would intervene divinely in this woman's heart, Father God, and drive her to a genuine encounter with you. That she would like Paul, be blinded by the light of your presence and fall on her face and hear you calling her (Acts 9:2-6).

And of course no Valentine's Day would be complete without this:

Lucas,

There are so many things that I love about you. I love your smile and way you make me feel when I am around you. I love your "Hakuna Matata" philosophy of life yet how seriously you have always taken your responsibilities at church. I love how you have never liked to read until you started seminary and now no one can stop you from devouring your commentaries. I love how you can pick up your guitar and transport yourself into another world where nothing in life matters. I love how unshakeable your confidence is and how you could care less to match but like to look good because you know how much it means to me. I love how much you know about everything and how you can engage anyone in a conversation. I love how you make a big deal of the things that matter to me. I love how nothing is ever more important than listening to me when I just need you to listen to me. I love the way you love me. I hope you know that I love you more than I ever thought possible. Thank you for picking me as your wife. I am eternally indebted to God for the husband He has blessed me with. Eu te amo cada dia mais.

Your linda,

Indi

This is the video my hubby used to introduce his sermon on Sunday. Enjoy it!

Forgiving Myself

Photo Credit: Timothy K Hamilton (Flickr)

I have a hard time with this. I am not sure if it's because I demand so much from myself; I expect perfection and won't settle for anything less. Maybe it's just that I haven't fully grasped what 1 John 1:9 means when God's word tells us, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us."

Many times the enemy comes to play the old tapes in my head. They sound a little like this, "You're speaking about Jesus?!? What makes you think YOU can make a difference? Don't you remember the time when you __________? And how could you forget what happened when __________." Satan has a field day when I dwell on those thoughts. I begin to doubt whether I can really be used by Him.

And then the Holy Spirit gently whispers into my ear, "Indy, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" The bible does not say that only a select few are forgiven. No, it is very clear that anyone that is in Christ is a new creation. I am forgiven. The price has been paid for my sins. ALL of them.

I am grateful that God isn't the angry God I used to believe He was. He isn't sitting up in heaven waiting for me to mess up. He is a loving father that simply desires that I know and love Him above all things.

I think this is they key to self-forgiveness.

Breaking out of Prison

I have a very good memory. It is actually too good for my own sake. I tend to remember the little details that others forget and hold on to things that perhaps I probably shouldn't be holding on to.

The Lord knew that inevitably we would get offended (some of us more than others) and that's why he commands us to forgive 7 x 70 times. Does it mean that a person gets 490 chances and then if they hurt you again you no longer have to forgive them? NO. What it does mean is that as God has forgiven us we are to forgive others. We are to forgive on a daily basis and we are to forgive no matter what they have done. Many times it will mean that we will forgive out of obedience to God with our minds and then our hearts will follow.

Lately God has been bringing to light people in my life that have hurt me and I need to forgive. Not so much because they need my forgiveness but because I need to forgive them for me. I have discovered that by choosing not to forgive I am keeping myself in a prison. It is a dark cell filled with anger, resentment and bitterness. When I choose to forgive, I am liberating myself.

Today I choose to open the door of my cell and let myself out. Today, I choose to forgive. Will you choose forgiveness or will you stay behind the bars?

Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."
-Luke 23:34

Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay,"says the Lord.
-Romans 12:19